Steven Weiner: I'm Steven "The Turtle" Weiner (pronounced Whiner) and you're watching NickPro on NickToons! OH SHELL YEAH!
x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x
DON'T TRY THIS AT HOME!x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x
NickPro Wrestling
Episode 1/Season 1
January 5, 2015
The music starts over images of wrestling action inside an orange and green colored ring. KC Day, Bilvis Wesley, Colby Corino, Steven "The Turtle" Weiner, The Evil Ninjas, Gary the Barn Owl, "Da Bully" DeVito and Colin Delaney quickly blaze by, showcasing their moves to the blistering tune. With the music coming to an end, the camera finds host Joey Styles ...
Joey Styles: "Welcome wrestling fans! Thank you for tuning in to NickPro Wrestling on NickToons as part of the Wednesday evening NickSports programming. We come to this evening with a 10-man Over-the-Top Battle Royal ... with only 30 minutes of television time, LET'S GET RIGHT TO THE ACTION!"
The audience cheers as the camera swings around to see the wrestlers make their way into the ring for the start of our match. Not much time to set things up as we get right to the action but before we do, time for a commercial break!
x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x
COMMERCIAL BREAK
x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x
We come back and the "striped zebra" calls for the bell to get this one underway!
10-Man Battle Royal: American Balloon, KC Day, Bilvis Wesley, Colby Corino, Steve "The Turtle" Weiner, The Evil Ninjas #1 & #2, Gary the Barn Owl, "Da Bully" DeVito and Colin Delaney. Your referee is Barry Delaney.Joey Styles: "There's the bell and we are underway with our first match in the fledgling NickPro. OH MY GOD!"
x Evil Ninja #1 & #2 pushed Gary the Barn Owl from his perch at 0:00:02We have our first elimination of the match as the red bearded person identified as Gary the Barn Owl, perched on the top rope like an owl, is shoved off. Unlike his namesake, this owl does not take flight and crashes hard onto the floor far below. One is quickly down within seconds of the match starting. Everyone pairs off and hammers away at each other as these types of matches tend to go. The small guys in the ninja outfits go after the biggest guy, the American Balloon.
Joey Styles: "For those of you wondering, the American Balloon who spent most of his career overseas came out of retirement just to partake in our debut show. An amazing story, the Balloon wrestled at close to the 400 lb. mark and has since dropped well over half his weight. I have been told, once he gets to his goal, he will have surgery to remove the excess skin he carries around. Once finished here, he heads back to Mongolia where he works hard bringing much needed resources to underprivledged children. A truly inspirational story."
The little guys struggle with the much bigger Balloon who grabs both and cracks their heads together. They stagger around before they are both given the heave-ho!
x American Balloon threw out Evil Ninja #2 at 0:02:19
x American Balloon tossed out Evil Ninja #1 at 0:02:20The Balloon has very little time to celebrate before he is sent over the top rope. Four down in less than three minutes.
x Colin Delaney & DeVito threw out Balloon at 0:02:25Joey Styles: "Four men down and six remaining in our TV time limit match. Let's talk about the 2 ladies who accompanied our wrestlers to the ring and are currently patrolling the outside of the ring. Allison Danger, the sister of "King" Steve Corino and an accomplished wrestler in her own right, is here for her nephew, Colby, Steve's young son. The "American Tiger" as he often goes by has true Wrestling Royalty in his family and is sure to be a good one here in NickPro and in the future. On the other side of the ring, currently berating her two eliminated "Evil" Ninja is Becky Bayless. Miss Bayless has history with KC Day, who is still in the match, during their time together as members of Special K. I guess it is safe to assume these two liked cereal?"
Next to go is the Elvis Impersonator, Bilvis Wesley in a bit of a comedy spot as Wesley hammered away on Steven Weiner. After taking a big knifehand to the chest, Weiner turned around on the second one, leaving Wesley to smack Weiner's "shell". Acting like his hand was broken, Bilvis Wesley is easy prey for Colby Corino who dropkicks him over the top. The "American Tiger" and "The Turtle" celebrate with a high five before getting back into the action.
x Colby Corino threw out Bilvis Wesley at 0:06:16Colin Delaney puts a beating on Colby Corino and hams it up with the booing crowd before KC Day gets into the act, grabbing Delaney by the scruff of his neck and tossing him to the outside. While that goes on, DeVito steps in and stomps the downed Corino, taking great pleasure in it.
x KC Day eliminated Colin Delaney at 0:08:30Joey Styles: "Mr. ECW as Colin Delaney likes to refer to himself, "Extremely Cute Wrestler" finds himself on the outside looking in having been removed from the match by KC Day. Extremely cute? That is highly debateable. UH OH! KC Day receiving a bit of a tongue lashing from Becky Bayless who has remained ringside after sending her masked men to the back. We have to take a break ... DO NOT GO AWAY!"
x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x
COMMERCIAL BREAK
x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x
We return to the action with KC Day, Colby Corino and Steven "The Turtle" Weiner all taking turns smacking "Da Bully" DeVito. Lots for the fans to cheer here, as our three continue to work in unison.
Joey Styles: "While Devito gets what he deserves, let me take a moment to speak on Steven Weiner. "The Turtle" has a truly uplifting story. Despite having Aspergers syndrome, a developmental disorder affecting his ability to effectively socialize and communicate, Mr. Weiner has refused to let anything get in the way of his dream to become a professional wrestler."
Day and Corino hip toss DeVito, allowing Weiner to land a Senton, crushing "Da Bully" with his "shell". We get a "Chinese Fire Drill" as all three men drop continous leg drops on DeVito. Seemingly out on his feet, DeVito plays a bit of possum as Day comes charging in, only to take a knee to the midsection ...
x DeVito threw out KC Day at 0:13:47Joey Styles: "DeVito playing possum and eliminating Day, leaving him with Colby Corino and "The Turtle". The fans have been behind these two young men the entirety of the match and the elimination of KC Day has not dampened their feelings one bit. Uh Oh, KC Day getting more grief from Becky Bayless as she follows him to the back. That's something I think we need to pay attention to."
DeVito on the comback trail as he is able to strip Weiner's shell backpack and use it to his own advantage. Both play the "devastating effect" of the shell as they take shots with it. DeVito puts it on and riles up the crowd saying that he's going to rid this place of "punk kids and stupid turtles". That does not go over well with the fans.
x DeVito gave the heave ho to Colby Corino at 0:18:48Joey Styles: "AND THEN THERE WERE TWO!"
Now one-on-one, DeVito turns his attention to a single adversary. DeVito continues with the beating and Weiner oversells a bit before using an inside cradle to pull DeVito to the mat. A bit of a goof there, referee Barry Delaney steps in to break up the pin attempt. The fans start chanting Weiner's name as Delaney explains the situation to the wrestler. DeVito shoves the referee out of the way before the wrestlers lock up and fight for control. DeVito works Weiner to a knee but "The Turtle" fights his way to his feet as the chanting grows louder. With a nifty go-behind, Weiner is able to retake his "shell" from his opponent before we get a replay of the earlier spot with the knifehand chop. Weiner chops back.
Joey Styles: "DeVito hits the shell! Weiner chops back! DeVito with a boot! NOOOOO! HE GOT THE SHELL! WEINER WITH A WHIP INTO THE CORNER! HE CHARGES IN! AS STEVEN WEINER IS WANT TO SAY ... OH SHELL YEAH!"
Weiner follows DeVito into the corner, turning around at the last second and smashing into DeVito with his "shell". As DeVito staggers out of the corner, he is grabbed by the head and is led towards the ropes before being thrown over the top. Before he knows what hit him, "Da Bully" DeVito hits the ring apron and falls out onto the floor!
x Steve "The Turtle" Weiner threw out DeVito at 0:21:31Joey Styles: "OH MY GOD! STEVEN "THE TURTLE" WEINER HAS DEFEATED DEVITO AND WON THE BATTLE ROYAL!"
Weiner starts dancing in the ring as Vanilla Ice starts his rap ... "Go Ninja, Go Ninja Go". The camera returns to Joey Styles.
Joey Styles: "That's all the time we have ... join us right here next week for more NickPro! Good night!"
Card rating: ** 1/4